whoops, yao, my eyes
by psu on Nov 6, 2008 10:16 PM EST
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PrintLocation: secluded Office near Kinnick stadium, Iowa City
Time: Now
Knock at door
Come in.
Ferentz, I want to have a word with you, as you can see I brought my son and secretary with me. We have come about the behavior of some of your fans and the website mob.
Hello
Dad, I just saw a giant eagle walking down the hall.
Ferentz, what are you doing on that god blang computer thing, is that pictures of that Illinois linebacker Lehman you have there.
Uh, well yeah, it seems some of our fans think he is great, so I was looking into recruiting him to spice up, I mean help our offense.
Well you are dumber than I thought, but that is not why I am here. I have heard that some of your fans have made fun of me, my good friend and fly fisherman Joe Tiller, and even my own son. But what really kills me are the pink lockers.
Um, well I can check into some of that, we here in Iowa...
Holy dog shit. Iowa? Only steers and queers come from Iowa. And you don't look much like a steer to me so that kinda narrows it down. Now stand up because I am going to show you how I take care of kids like you back in PA.
Joe stands up
Ferentz stands up
Whoops!
Yao!
My eyes!
Holy Jesus! What is that? WHAT IS THAT, FERENTZ? Why are your pants down around your ankles while you are sitting at your desk looking at pictures of J Lehman.
I, um, well...
That's it, Nancy call whoever we were supposed to play this weekend and cancel the game because I am bringing the team over here to teach this pansy and his team a lesson.
Sir, we are already scheduled to play Iowa this weekend.
Excellent, come on Jay let's get out of here. Let's give them a preview of things to come: WE ARE!
OBAMA!
For the love of all things holy, it is Penn State, let's try again: WE ARE!
PENN STATE!
WE ARE!
Dad, there goes that eagle again!
Oh christ, I am bringing McQueary next time.
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I'm not completely sure why
perhaps it was the way you typed him out, but I was using a Texas accent for JoePa on all his “quotes” up there, and I have to say, I found it rather amusing.
I am using the voice...
…of the drill sargent from Full Metal Jacket….I guess it is the steers and queers comment.
Pat Devlin in '08, er, '09
just as I intended, the holy jesus quote is also full metal jacket
I don't know, Mello Yello is pretty awful. What's the worst that could happen?
I thought it might have been the steers and queers comment
but I was using a texasy accent before that comment even. Maybe it was the “god blang computer thing” and the “well you are dumber than I thought” comments. Either way, definitely brought FMJ thoughts to mind throughout ;-)
by The JuggerNitt on Nov 7, 2008 10:30 AM EST up reply actions
this can be remedied.
I don't know, Mello Yello is pretty awful. What's the worst that could happen?
Something
needs done with these ads that keep popping up over top of what I am trying to read. Then if you click “close” it puts your cursor right over the ad so it pops up again. Damn BigLots!
JoePa in '09
To avoid accusations of plagiarism, please link to original material in the future. Original can be found here: http://www.blackheartgoldpants.com/
I did plagarize, I put links to BHGP throughout the post.
I don't know, Mello Yello is pretty awful. What's the worst that could happen?
I don't think
the guys at BHGP mind one bit. MGoBlog does the same thing from time to time. Unlike some people, the guys at BHGP see it as flattery when someone immitates them.
Mike
Black Shoe Diaries
by BSD on Nov 7, 2008 2:18 PM EST up reply actions
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