1. Putting Ohio State jerseys on the quarterbacks was a huge mistake. The general suck combined with a flurry of arm punts was Terr-Hell to watch.

2. Ki-Jana is Casino-Owning American for Fast Runner Choppy Talker

3. Coach looks taller without his glasses.

4. PJ Jones thinks he is throwing to receivers with OMGSEC speed.

5. Rob Bolden is a double naught spy sent to sabotage the position.

6. The hairiest thing on the field is supposed to be the mascot.

7. Westley's girlfriend is going to marry Sean Penn.

8. BOB needs to have an led light installed into the cleft to signal plays to the QB.

9. I can't find that Pornasol shaving cream at my local WalMart

10. I miss Joe.