FanPost

Off Topic Tuesday - Worst Date Night

Well, it's only Tuesday and the fanpost and shots have been filled with non-football related stuff (save for an entertaining thread on craziest fans just a bit ago). I've been thinking of a topic that is unrelated to most of what has been on here, but has come up a few times in comments sections...dating. I thought I would narrow down the broad subject to the worst date night you've ever experienced.


Now, this isn't a "he was such a loser" or "she looked nothing like her profile pics" type discussion, but rather circumstances beyond (or at least mostly beyond) either of you or your date's control that lead to a terrible experience. I thought this could be both fun and possible cathartic, but that could just be my self-deprecating humor talking hold of my judgement.

I'm gonna throw myself out on a limb and start this off with what I consider to be my second worst date experience, que lights, set stage:

The North End of Boston, summer of '07. Last night of The Fisherman's Feast, the adoration of the Madonna del Soccorso in which a young girl dressed as an angel is lowered from a building to pray by the Madonna and then is raised back up again as if she were flying.

There is nothing that evokes romance like Italian culture, and nothing in Boston that embodies Italian like the North End. From my many dating experiences here, I've learned that women love being taken to the North End on a first date, even better, they love being taken to something they didn't even know existed on a first date, even better, combining the two. This was money(yeah that phrase dates me but we were both in our 30s). There was no way this could have sucked as a date. I mean nothing could happend to ruin this, nothing other than this...

With the crowd gathering closer together in anticipation of the "angel's" decent, there was a sudden "errrup" and splattering noise behind me and a wetness on my leg. I look at my date, a horrified expression upon her face then on the couple behind me. The guy laughs and then drags his woman away, with her face down. I'm still perplexed at this point, probably just not wanting to grasp what just happend. The next couple behind us, looking completely shell-shocked and sympathetic offer us their water and the wife goes digging for as many tissues as she can find. My date has puke on her blouse and down her pants. She walks off to get more napkins and some one else asks me if I'm okay and all I can do is feebly state "This is not what I hoped for on a first date." The sympathy and suppressed laughter of the crowd was palpable.

We soldiered on and watched the completion of the ceremony and even walked to the Common to finish our pastries before boarding the T to our separate destinations. There were plenty of other reasons of why we weren't going "to make it" as a couple but this certainly was a disaster of a date beyond either of our control.

I realize this is WAY of topic, but am hoping to lighten the mood for a bit. Have at it with your worst experiences, and maybe I'll share mine also and not just my second worst....

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