I'm a child of the digital age. So I just don't know anything about record players. Not a clue. I was hesitant to buy one at first because all of the people who recommended it to me are people who listen to dang dirty hipster music. They all seemed to believe that CDs took over just because record companies hate human freedom and good music or some such hipster malarkey. Also, the real reason they like record players is because they're not popular and you know how hipsters are. Dogs. Anyway, I hate hipsters and don't trust them.

But then I went and found this:

It does sound better than digital.

WELL, THERE AIN'T NO USE IN MY WORKIN' SO HARD...

WHEN I GOT A WOMAN IN THE BOSS MAN'S YARD!

Furthermore, I have found several Hag vinyl albums that are actually cheaper than CDs and MP3s. God only knows how good a Roy Nichols guitar solo could sound in such a format.

So, I need people to tell me all they know about record players and stuff.