FanPost

PENN STATE HAS RELEASED ITS WRESTLING SCHEDULE AND I MUST BE ABLE TO HITCHHIKE

As the title says, I need someone to tell me how to hitchhike, now damn it now.

February 3rd, 2013, Penn State at Iowa in Carver-Hawkeye Arena. It’s gonna be like the biggest thing ever. Gable will be there. Brands, Cael, the other Brands, Cunningham, Cody, Taylor, Ruth, McD, Ramos, St. John, the ghost of Farmer Burns, Frank Gotch, all will be there.

Pennsylvania wrestling is at the top of the world. And we will prove it in the most legendary place in all of American wrestling. After that, after we win there, what next? I don’t know. Maybe Moscow. Maybe even the Caucasus region itself – the land of Stalin and Saitiev.

I must be there. I must be in Iowa City. I will not be able to drive myself, nor buy tickets of any kind, so I must hitchhike. Tell me how to hitchhike.

Others must join me. You can hitchhike with me. We must go to Iowa City on February 3rd, 2013 for the most important moment in the history of Western civilization.

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