A Completely Unresearched Breakdown of This Season's Matchups

Tired of hearing about the NCAA, Mark Emmert, sanctions and how bad the next decade's going to be? Me too.

Let's get busy talking about what we think the team is actually capable of this year.

What follows is an intangible, probably optimistic, moxie-drenched look at each game this season.


I'm projecting this one as a win. I know Ohio is going to be the best team in the MAC, and I know it could be a close one. But I think after the last year, especially the last month, the Bobcats will be at the wrong end of a lot of anger release, both from the team and the fans. W

Sept. 8 Virginia

Loss numero uno, mostly because it's the first time the team has been away since the sanctions. Factor in Virginia being a solid team, and I don't see them coming away with this one. L

Sept. 15 NAVY

I see this one as a tossup. Navy is such a weird team, and they could give the Lions a run. Then again, it's back at home, and they're such a weird team. Still leaning towards a loss. L

Sept. 22 TEMPLE

Much as I hate to say it, I think we lose this one. The Owls nearly beat us last year, and last year....well, we were better. L

Sept. 29 Illinois

So apparently Tim Beckman has been comparing each game to a military operation: "Battle of Insert Opponent Here." Fuck that guy. W


Last homecoming for the seniors means more this year than any year before. Also, Persa is gone. Dubya. W

Oct. 20 Iowa

Away at the recent bane of PSU's existence, during the worst year of PSU's existence? Sigh. L


I'm making the trip to this game. I will be drunk, yelling awful things at Urban Meyer and cheering at the top of my lungs. That's worth at least two extra touchdowns. Also, wildly unconfirmed reports have BOB calling in a favor from Mrs. Brady to record an audio tape telling Matt McGloin that he is more athletic, better looking and moxie-er than Tom Brady. That's good for another two touchdowns. And let's be honest, OSU is the worst. W

Nov. 3 Purdue

We beat them last year behind Redd and Fera, who will be residing in other states this year. This is another toss-up for me. It's away, potentially a trap game after the last week's emotional win over OSU and the next week's tough matchup against Nebraska. Still, I lean towards a win, for no other reason than that I want to. W

Nov. 10 Nebraska

Let's move on. L


Indiana will always be Indiana, even if I was starting at QB for PSU. W


O'Brien v. O'Brien. A suddenly slightly more likable Bielema. Maybe Ball doesn't have as great a year after a slow start from not being ready for camp? Still a loss, more than likely. L

So. That's 6-6 by my count. With a tossup against Navy that could get us to 7-5. Either way, football is less than a month away. Let's get it.



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