Pickin' Nits is Basically Done

Matthew O'Haren-USA TODAY Sports

Every PSU sport except for Track and Field is done for the year, which renders this piece more irrelevant than it already is (insert "That's not possible!" joke here). We'll figure out how we'll cover track every week, but for now, let's consider this the final Pickin' Nits of the year. There is only one song that is appropriate here, the most successful single in Motown history and my pick for the second greatest boy band song of all time -- End of the Road by Boyz II Men. Let's go.

Track and Field

  • Track had their outdoor championships, where the women's team won the Big Ten and the men's team took eighth. GIMME DAT McGLOIN CHAMPIONSHIP BELT GIF.
  • Several Nittany Lions had notable days: Mahagony Jones locked up first in the 100 M dash and second in the 200 M dash, Marta Klebe came in second in the 1500 M run, Evonne Britton won the 100 M hurdles and came in fourth in the 400 M hurdles (teammate Kiah Seymour took second in the 400 M), Melissa Kurzdorfer came in second in the hammer throw and Lauren Kenney/Laura Loht were 1-2 in the javelin.
  • On the guy's side: Casimir Loxsom came in second in the 800 M run and Robby Creese came in second in the 1500 M run. That's it for their finisher who came in the top two. Well, that's not good.
  • The Week Ahead: The team has NCAA Eastern Prelims in Greensboro, where 41 Nittany Lions will be competing. To put that into perspective, every other PSU team is sending zero athletes to the NCAA Eastern Prelim in Greensboro this week. Impressive stuff.

Women's Golf

  • Women's Golf had NCAA Regionals at Auburn, where the team came in 19th place at +47, shooting a 911 on the tournament. PSU's two best finishers were junior Ellen Ceresko, who shot a +9 225 and came in 60th, and freshman Grace Chung, who shot a +11 227 and came in 70th.
  • The Week Ahead: The season's over. Instead of a song to remember their season, I'll instead use an insanely appropriate video: the last few minutes of the greatest golf movie of all time, Happy Gilmore.

Lax

  • Both lax teams fell in the NCAA Tournament. The men got waxed by Yale, 10-7. I know that score looks close, but Yale went on an insane 9-1 run. Now, I only played one year of lax, so I'm far from an expert, but I can say with 71 percent certainty that letting your opponent go on a 9-1 run isn't good. TJ Sanders led the way for the Lions with two goals. He's a freshman, and he's very good (not unlike Barry Zuckerkorn, I know I've used that joke before but you can never have too many Arrested Development jokes).
  • Women's lax won both of their early round games (beating Canisius 14-13 and UMass 12-9) before falling to Northwestern in the Elite Eight for the third time this season, 15-7. The ladies had 12 2-goal performances over the three games. They all deserve Nattys for their performance.
  • The Week Ahead: The season's over. Obviously, we're honoring their season with some DMB, because stereotypes of Lax players never stop being fun. Here's Say Goodbye.

Softball

  • Softball lost their Big Ten tourney quarterfinal matchup against Minnesota, 4-0. They got two hit in the process. On a far more interesting note, Minnesota had won 34 games this season up to that point, 30 of them by the person who pitched against PSU. That's cool, I guess.
  • The Week Ahead: The season's over. Because softball is a comically bad team, we're gonna remember them with a comically bad song (that you probably forgot ever existed): PopoZão by Kevin Federline.

Baseball

  • Since I decided to wait until women's lax finished up their season to publish this, baseball has had seven games since the last edition of Pickin' Nits. The Cliffnotes version: they went 2-5. They lost all three against Illinois two weekends ago (9-0, 8-6, 5-4), beat Villanova last Tuesday (7-4) and went 1-2 against Sparty (lost the first game 16-1, won the second game 9-0, lost their season finale 2-1).
  • Some fun stats for the end of baseball's regular season -- the team went 9-11 at home and 3-25 on the road, they hit seven homers (as a team, no, seriously), nobody who played in at least 25 games hit .300 and the team committed 90 errors in 50 games. Also, Steven Hill had a 3.39 ERA, didn't allow a single homer and somehow went 1-7. PSU baseball really is the best.
  • The Week Ahead: Tourney time! The team has the Big Ten tournament in Minneapolis, starting on Wednesday..........oh, wait. They didn't qualify for their conference tournament. So their season's over. I want to honor their season with a Sinatra song about how life can suck and you just need to power through it, because that perfectly describes the baseball team this season. So we're going with "That's Life."

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