I have been absolutely loving all of these flashbacks to the great games, seasons, and players of Penn State's past. It's great hearing about the '86 and '94 seasons from people who lived them, and I'm loving all of the flashbacks to the years I was in school just as much. The review of the 2005 Ohio State game alone made me giddy for days.
But at the same time, I'm a Philly fan. We are a terrible lot that would much rather see a hated player fail than a loved player succeed, and heartbreak and misery is something that we just come to expect out of our sports teams (there was that World Series team in 2008, but the GM in charge now is making sure we won't win one of those again anytime soon). Throughout these great reviews of Penn State's past, I am seeing a little of the bitterness from some of the old season's that weren't QUITE perfect, and now I want to blow up the dam and let it all out.(Also, favorite opponents? Uh...ok.) So, join me on a bitter journey of despair and heartbreak, accompanied with a lot of cursing. And if I'm stealing an idea from the writers that they were going to do later, AHAHAHA I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER ALL OF THIS THUNDER I'M STEALING
My (least) favorite Penn State games, seasons, players, and other stuff.
My least favorite game: Iowa 2008
2 weeks previous, the Lions were victorious in Columbus in a tough fight with the Buckeyes. It ended in tears for OSU (ha! get it?!), though in the victory our beloved Daryll Clark had to come out of the game due to a concussion. Fortunately, he had the bye week to recover, after which we traveled to Iowa City. Iowa had stumbled to a 3-3 start, and going into the game they sat at 5-4, although you could see the improvement week to week. i was confident of a victory, but I knew it would be a tough out.A few things from the game; it was obnoxiously cold. Also, the student section was trying to do a "Greene Out" for Shonn Greene, and it looked absolutely terrible. I pointed at my TV and laughed at them.
So the game starts. Now, I didn't just review the previous game to make Terrelle Pyror jokes, as fun as they may be. I brought that up because on our first drive, in a bitter cold stadium, on the road, we opened up on offense WITH THREE STRAIGHT PASSES. Never mind the lacrosse playing superhero in our backfield, let's let DC17 get sacked on 3rd and 10 because pain is fun. Given a short field, Iowa's Shonn Greene punched it in for the Hawkeyes, much to the delight of the Iowa students huddled in their dorms and apartments, since it was way too cold to go to the actual game. Come on.
The next Penn State drive featured LOTS of Evan Royster, and 19 plays and 71 yards later...we settled for a field goal(this becomes important later). Iowa does nothing on it's next drive, and PSU puts together another long drive on the ground and this time punches it in for a touchdown. Things are looking up. Iowa again, does nothing on offense, and PSU puts together another good looking drive that again stalls out in the red zone. FG is good, PSU up 13-7. The half ends with Iowa being terrible at offense.
Right out of the half Tyrell Sales picks off Ricky Stanzi, and PSU has a chance to go for the jugular. Instead...we settle for another god damned field goal. The next drive drive Iowa discovers something; we can't cover Derrell Johnson-Koulianos(DJK for short, as Kinnick Stadium told us) if our lives depended on it. His stats on the drive: 4 targets, 3 receptions, 47 yards, 2 first downs and a touchdown. Ouch.
Even though we punt on the next drive(Jeremy Boone belts a monster 43 yarder), Stanzi fumbles and Penn State recovers. An end-around (I think) to Derrick Williams puts Penn State up 23-14. Not going for 2 here kind of makes sense; better to be up 2 scores than 1. At the same time the decision makes me nervous. Still, I'm confident. I'm also really hoping Kirk Ferentz forgets he has a receiver we can't cover on his team. Iowa gets the ball back and the 4th quarter begins. Iowa does nothing but gets a great punt. PSU decides the the best time to get away from the highly successful ground game is in the 4th quarter while protecting a lead. We punt. Iowa gets it's offense together and scores a touchdown on the short field. 23-21. nervousnervousnervous.
The next drive stalls, but on the punt, Boone does a great acting job and pulls a roughing the kicker penalty even though he never gets touched. A Stephfon Green run and a pass from Williams has us at the Iowa 23. 2 rushes and a holding penalty have us facing 3rd and 24. While a draw would be a safe play, once again a long pass play is developed. And Williams is WIDE OPEN. But...DC17 sails it. Interception. My Philly instincts kick in. I know what's coming even after Odrick sacks Stanzi on first down. Scirrotto is flagged for pass interference on 3rd and forever. DJK catches 2 first down passes. PSU is out of time outs.
I...did not take this loss well. And for good reason. We ended the year with blow outs against Indiana and Michigan State (screw you Dantonio, you're down 4 touchdowns AND ITS SO GOD DAMNED COLD STOP CALLING TIME OUT). This left the championship game between Sam Bradford's Oklahoma and the Florida Tim Tebows. More than likely we would have faced Florida, and I would have loved to watch our front 7 beat the ever loving crap out of Football Jesus. Oklahoma didn't impress me at all either, their offense was pretty good but that defense was absolutely terrible. Instead we got stuck with a USC team with enormous receivers, Mark Sanchez before he sucked, and their pro-style attack designed specifically to tear a BBDS zone defense to shreds. Which they did. A few mistakes by our offense, and the game was out of reach by the 3rd quarter.
For the most part, I loved the 2008 season. Great games, great players, Joe Paterno looking like he had found the fountain of youth. But this game. God damn you Iowa.
Dishonorable Mentions:
Michigan 2005 (UGH BIG TEN REFS)
Ohio State 2002 (This was while I was still in high school, but I loved watching Larry Johnson, and we really had a shot in this game. Also, I HATED that lucky piece of crap Buckeye team. /fart noise)
Iowa 2009
Illinois 2010 (Illinois ran 5 plays all game. We could not stop them)
Wisconsin 2011
My least favorite player: Chris Baker
This is actually a tough one for me. I hate to really get on a player simply because they don't do well on the field. It's the college game! As long as they are giving their best and being a respectable person off the field, I have a hard time getting worked up about them. Do I think QB14 was as dumb as a sock full of nickels? Hell yes. Did his inability to hit the broad side of a barn make me want to beat him with said sock full of nickels? A little. But other than a little douchebaggery (which I think mellowed out a bit once he began to realize he wasn't that good) Morelli in general didn't make too much of an ass of himself off the field, and I never thought he dogged it on the field.
Now that is not to say that there hasn't been a few people of poor character/judgement to suit up for the Lions. And with sports media growing like Audrey Jr, every little incident usually blew up whether it was warranted or not. Austin Scott has been in the news recently for...reasons(move to Colorado man!). Larry Johnson has a tendency to beat up women. Chris "Sack up and Stab me" Bell. For me, none of these guys match up to Phil Taylor, and his partner in crime, Chris Baker.
What an embarrassment. I really try to not get too judgmental about other peoples lives; I don't know what personal issues they may be working through, or what demons from their past or present may be haunting them. But in his short time at Penn State, I think Baker tried to fight EVERYONE. I can only think of 2 specific incidents while he was here (massive ones that they might be) but it felt like he was in the paper every freaking week for getting into another massive brawl. The worst of which being the one at Meridian 2.
Even though I lived in Meridian 1 that year, I don't remember the specific night in question. But good lord do I remember reading about it. Something like 12-15 players were involved; I really do believe that other than the ones that started it (patient 0 was Scirrotto) most of the players were trying to diffuse the situation. But in the end, Baker put at least one student in the hospital. Here's how damaging this fight was; it was pretty much all the ammunition Vicky Triponey needed after IT to show how football #culture was out of control at Penn State. (Even though she was part of the system that consolidated power with the BOT which largely created the mess we got into. But we don't need to beat that dead horse) This story of big bad football players, who "never" got disciplined, going around beating the crap out of people fit perfectly into the narrative after IT, and Baker was the poster boy for it.
Eventually Baker transferred to Baylor and seemingly got his shit together. I think he got drafted too, but at this point the less I hear about him the better.
My least favorite lost recruit: Chad Henne
Another topic I'm hesitant to get very excited about. You're dealing with 17-19 year old kids who have had people telling them that they are the best player ever for a year or more, and then they essentially have to pick a team for 4 years. Sometimes they bungle the process, sometimes they don't consider the feelings of fans they've never met and don't owe anything to and just pick the situation that they feel is best for them. Things change, people exert influence, yada yada yada.
And even with this, I don't hold any real feelings of contempt for Henne, so long as the rumors that he told the PSU coaching staff he was committing to the Lions aren't true. And even then, sleeping on a decision then changing your mind in the morning is not an uncommon thing. What chaffs my ass is what could have been.
Once we lost the star QB of Wyomissing, we had to go other routes. So we aimed higher, and succeeded! We grabbed the 5 star QB who was actually ranked ahead of Henne! So it all worked out right? No. That QB was Anthony Morelli. We all know the rest. Henne orchestrated that miserable comeback in 2005, and ended our home winning streak the next year at Beaver Stadium. Once Michael Robinson...
...graduated, we left the keys to our offense in the hands of QB14. That did not go well. And that's the thing, we still had an incredible defense that kept us in almost every game in 2006 and 2007 regardless of how long they had to be on the field. Plus, Tony Hunt in the backfield to take the pressure off. The offensive line was...suspect in some of these games, but I really wonder just how good the team could have been if Henne was running the offense in 2006 and 2007 as opposed to QB14.
If nothing else, whoever Michigan starts in that game in 2005 sails the ball over Mario Manningham's head. Probably.
My least favorite thing on BSD: Nits and Len Bias jokes
Ughhhhhhhhh
The internet is a big place, so I won't call the Nits "discussion" the dumbest thing on the internet. I'm just saying it's in the top (bottom?) 5%. I still don't understand what the big deal is, or why people get so furiously worked up over it.
As for Bias jokes, good grief. We let a Maryland fan push us to the point of making jokes about the situation where, over 20 (30?) years ago, a gifted young man with a bright future tragically overdosed on a drug people still didn't really understand? Lame. Bias jokes are about as imaginative and insensitive as Sandusky jokes. And usually not funny. I expect that level or humor from Deadspin or the neanderthals I share professional rooting interests with. It's Maryland! Make fun of their stupid flag or the fact that their state contains the entire city of Baltimore, or the hilariously bad beer Natty Bo. Say Old Bay sucks (even though that's totally a lie, just say it to see the reaction). Point to their pussyfooting during the Civil War. Or that we are taking all of their best recruits. Or that their high water mark was a tie in a down year for Penn State. Just leave the Bias jokes at home.
Dishonorable mention:
M1EK and 'Bass. I joined right after the former of those 2 was banned, so I never had the joy (LOL) of participating in those discussions. This does not make me sad.
My least favorite Penn State season: 2011
I don't think I need to expand on this.
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