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Success With Hyperlinking Is Chillin' With Some Athletes

Autographs? Autographs.

By Bill DiFilippo
NOTE: KERRY COLLINS PROBABLY WON'T BE THERE
NOTE: KERRY COLLINS PROBABLY WON'T BE THERE
US PRESSWIRE
  • Some really, really, REALLY attractive man at Onward State did some hard hitting journalism (ok, I went onto GoPSU) to find out that there will be a OneTeam autograph session during Blue-White Weekend. Essentially, a bunch of athletes from a bunch of different teams will be signing autographs. If you would like athlete's autograph, but can't make it to Blue-White, go to Chipotle downtown sometime. Seriously. I can think of three specific times I've been there and seen athletes. Just don't ask for a quesarito. They're dicks about those.
  • ALL ABOAAAAAAAAAAAARD...the Penn State Coaches Caravan. We already know that BoB's gonna be droppin' Bombs over Baghdad (and by "Baghdad" I mean "The Mid Atlantic"), but the other three coaches joining? SO. MUCH. AWESOME. Russ "Tha God" Rose, Pat "He May Have Killed Before" Chambers and Cael "He Has Definitely Killed Before" Sanderson will be joining O'Brien on the PSU love train. You should go to this because I can't. Sad Bill is sad.
  • You know that Capital One Cup thing that you always see advertised while you're trying to watch football on Saturdays? Well, apparently, PSU's women are #1, one point over Oregon. I'd provide hard hitting analysis, but I really don't think anyone actually knows what this is. Not even Emmert. So he can't punish us for this. YOLO.
  • Speak of the Devil (seriously, this dude is the Devil), Emmert is still an asshole.
  • Football is in good shape. Well, better shape than they were last year at this time. Basically, now that they have a whole year to learn a bunch of insanely complex schemes, they feel better prepared now than they were at this time last season. GO FIGURE.
  • ANTHONY ADAMS UPDATE: He has essentially destroyed White Castle's twitter, not unlike how White Castle destroys your cholesterol. Adams also worked at White Castle for a little, and helped one of America's 422 favorite fast food chains gain money for autism research. Good on ya, Spice. Joe would be proud. Even if he probably didn't know what twitter meant.
  • OTHER STUFF: THON's 2014 overall committee was announced...UPUA held their elections, and someone I voted for actually won...Hot Chelle Rae is coming to the BJC, where they may perform more than the two songs by them that people have heard of...Noted PSU critic Buzz Bissinger is, um, just read...FREEDOM...Mexican soccer fans don't like American soccer fans...Peeing at Lehigh Valley Iron Pigs games is gonna be fun...THIS PROF IS ON FIYAAAAAAAAAAAA...Somewhere, there is an idiot that thinks Pat Chambers should be #fiured for not getting Andrew Wiggins to come to PSU...Parking in a deck is no longer going to be cash only, PRAISE THE LAWD.

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