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The Bank
The Bank
dude in helo-chopper

Sportif Massif

Men's Rugby Sevens were undefeated in pool play, but bowed out against the Naval Academy in the national quarterfinals, 17-22. Also noteworthy: Kutztown, Kutztown, Rah Rah Rah! beat Virginia Tech ELITE, 39-0. But it'll be UC Berkeley / UCLA in one semi-final, and Navy / Life University in the other. Quick Psychology Test: where do you suppose Life University is located, and what is the air speed velocity of an unladen swallow degrees do they confer?

Meanwhile, over at PennLive, Dustin Hockensmith takes a playful poke at the single greatest trophy in all of sport, the Land Grant. The article photo shows former offensive tackle Levi Brown, all 6'6", 320LBS of him, dwarfed by George Perles' shop class accident.

As Vecellio mentioned in the 2015 schedule release post, Maryland will host Penn State at M&T Bank Stadium ("the Bank") in Baltimore, MD ("Balto"). If you're going - and you should - you'll love it. As PSUbaltimore mentioned, there's not a bad seat in the house. I'm particularly fond of the west end zone, second level, between the goal posts. Now, there are zero cow pastures near the stadium in which to tailgate. But you're a block and a half from Inner Harbor, and from there you can catch a water taxi to Fells Point, Little Italy, and Canton, where you'll get the good stuff, instead of the pure tourist crap (yes, I'm referencing crack). You might have to land-taxi it to Federal Hill for Mother's, though. But in any event, it's just one more reason why Balto far exceeds DC, hon. Also, murder rates.

Basketbros - DoWorkPat Chambers promoted Brian Daly and Keith Urgo. Between handing out free Big Macs, Pat is still looking to fill a third spot on his staff, vacated by Eugene Burroughs.

While we're at it, we should mention PSU recruit Geno Thorpe, the 6'4" combo guard, earned MVP honors at the Mary Kline Classic.

World News

Former Senator George Mitchell, who could get elected in Maine without a pulse back in the day, and, therefore, could make tons of friends by voting for whatever the hell he wanted, submitted his 3rd quarterly report on Penn State's progress toward implementation of the Freeh Report recommendations. Of particular note, Mitchell praised PSU's grand efforts to shrink the size of the Board of Trustees - from 32 to 30. As of February 28th - meaning, there are three months since then - this praise cost Penn State just $1.4 million for six months of "work". That's a relative bargain. You try finding a big name to rubber stamp some crap, and fly into State College over the winter. Oh sure, Jon Voigt stopped by for a women's basketball game that one time. But do you think he'd be any less expensive? You could probably pick up ex-Representative Anthony Weiner from the bargin bin at half price today - but then you'd have to worry about his use of cell phones.

Can you name the first person to receive a Masters degree from Penn State? That would be C.Alfred Smith, who got it done with a simple hand written note from Evan Pugh, PSU's founding prez, approximately 150 years ago. Al Smith earned his note as Master of Scientific Agriculture, which is wholly different than Abstract Agriculture, or Epistemological Agriculture.

While the SEC bands together to promote slavery, illiteracy, and jorts, the Big Ten institutions will be collaborating in the fight against cancer.

Somewhere in Indiana, twixt the many meth labs, Boiler T Mill attempts to identify the B1G brethern Gods of BHGP's AIRBHG. Penn State? Lady Justice.

And speaking of both AIRBHG and meth labs, Adam Jacobi compares the recent Thrones episode to last year's PSU-Iowa stomp fest, in which Matt McGloin went 8-12, 146 yards and 2TDs - in the first quarter. It includes a pretty awesome 10-minutes-or-less video. I've watched it three times already.

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