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Former Foes: Week Five

Sure that sucked, but most of our former foes also are not elite.

PlayStation Fiesta Bowl - Penn State v Washington Photo by Jennifer Stewart/Getty Images

2018 Former Foes

Appalachian State Mountaineers

Last Seen: Opening Sun Belt play the same way they finished up their non-con schedule: scoring a ton of points, and beating South Alabama, 52-7.

App State’s stat sheet also looks thoroughly similar. They put up a ton of yards and allow very few. On the season, in four games including vs. Penn State, the Mountaineers are averaging 523 yards of offense while their defense is holding opposing teams to 276.

That’s a nice recipe for winning. Which should be fun for Penn State fans to watch them continue to do the rest of the season, while perhaps bolstering a Nittany Lions College Football Playoff case, should #chaos rain down enough for us to even entertain such notions after Saturday’s heartbreak.

Zac Thomas threw two picks, on 8 of 18 passing and two TD’s, but he complemented that with six carries for 77 yards and another two scores.

He good.

Next Up: Tuesday, October 9, at the Arkansas State Red Wolves, 8p, on ESPN2. Yay, Tuesday Night Football!

Bonus, bonus: Arkansas State’s logo:

The Arkansas State Red Wolf is both menacing and amused at your feeble feebleness.

2018 Record: 3-1.

Pitt Panthers

Last Seen: Losing again.

To UCF, in Spectrum Stadium in Orlando, 45-14. Pitt couldn’t run or stop the run, and fell under .500 for the first time this season.

They were also plagued by a return of the Penalty Bug, committing 11 for 125 yards.

In loyal service to our loyal commentariat, I went in search of juizzy Narduzzi comments for you and stumbled upon a Pitt site talking about....James Franklin, of course!

I figure this should be a tasty enough appetizer for you restless bye-weekers:

I’m assuming a lot of Pitt fans watched the Penn State vs. Ohio State game. What an atmosphere and what a game. And you probably weren’t mad about the outcome, either. It must be fun to watch a good football team on a Saturday night. However, did you see James Franklin’s post game press conference? You could tell just how bad that loss was bothering him. He looked like he was one second away from blowing up and throwing his chair into the audience.

Meanwhile, on the contrary, did you see head coach Pat Narduzzi’s post game press conference after Pitt lost? It’s the same thing every week.

“UCF is a good football team,” Narduzzi said.

“I’ll have to check the tape to determine how well Kenny Pickett played.”

And, “Our kids played their tails off.”

And then you have James Franklin telling the media that his program is making the jump from being a “great” team to an “elite” team. He said it’s going to be all the little details that are going to make the difference. He used going to class and taking notes in every meeting as examples on how that would work. There’s a big difference between the two coaches after losses. During Narduzzi’s Monday press conference, if you didn’t know the score on Saturday, you would have thought that Pitt beat UCF by 25 points. He was laughing, smiling and making jokes with the media.

Next Up: Saturday, hosting dangerous Syracuse, 12p, on Raycom Sports.

2018 Record: 2-3.

Kent State Golden Flashes

Last Seen: Getting balled out by Ball State, 52-24, and not even getting paid for it this time.

Woody Barrett threw for 314 yards on 30 of 44, for a completion percentage of 68.2%, but only one touchdown, and a pick. While on the other side, Ball State’s Riley Neal also completed 30 passes, on 50 attempts—but for 402 yards and 4 TD’s.

Coach Sean Lewis’ Beard struggled in the Discipline Department. The Golden Flashes over-flashed to the tune of 17(!) for 142 yards(!)


Smh, Coach Lewis givin all the squares ammo that his team needs to be more clean shaven.

Next Up: Saturday, hosting the Bobcats of Ohio at Dix Stadium, 3:30p, on ESPN+.

2018 Record: 1-4.

Illinois Fighting Illini

Last Seen: Getting scrubbed out, after putting up a very tough fight, by Penn State 63-24.

That says the same thing as last week because the Illini had a bye week this past Saturday.

Next Up: Saturday, Oct 6, at Rutgers, 12p, on BTN.

2018 Record: 2-2.

Ohio State Buckeyes

Last Seen: Saturday night, squeaking by Penn State 27-26.

You’ve read all the dope takes.

Bring on Dantonio.

Next Up: Saturday, Oct 6, hosting Indiana, 4p, on FOX.

2018 Record: 5-0.

Former Bros

Mississippi State Bulldogs

Former Penn State Assistant and all-around likeable bro, Joe Moorhead, is now the Head Coach at MSU. We’ll follow his progress here this season too.

Last Seen: Saturday, looking around frantically for their offense, but failing, and losing to Florida at home, 13-6.

Has our bro Joe Mo been brought low? Who knows. But his O has been way worse that so-so.

104 yards rushing, 98 passing. Ohhhhh, no.

Next Up: No respite, as Guz Malzahn & #8 Auburn come to town, Saturday, 7:30p, on ESPN2.

2018 Record: 3-2.

2017 Former Joes

Akron or Pitt? You decide!

Akron Zips

Last Seen: September 22, squeaking out a loss to Iowa State, 26-13. They were off last week.

Next Up: Beginning MAC play this Saturday, Oct 6, at Miami Ohio, 3:30p, on ESPN+.

2018 Record: 2-1.

Archive of Former Former Foes:

  1. 2018 Preseason
  2. 2018 Week One
  3. 2018 Week Two
  4. 2018 Week Three
  5. 2018 Week Four