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Grading the Football Team’s Dance Performance at THON

Did Yetur Gross-Matos wear a wig? Yes. Yes, he did.

Dana Lipshutz/Onward State

Credit to Onward State for the photo. For actual THON coverage, make sure you’re following along with them on their live blog and following them on the Twitter machine.

It’s THON weekend up in Happy Valley, and you know what that means? It’s dance off time, folks.

For those that aren’t as familiar with THON’s proceedings, on Saturday evening they hold the Pep Rally, which involves a dance competition between some of Penn State’s athletic teams — you know, the swim team, women’s volleyball, the men’s soccer team, etc — and of course, the football team.

I’ve been judging the football team’s performances since 2011. You can check last year’s post (yes, I am going to write this every year) for some of my longer thoughts, but here’s the top three performances:

  1. 2011 (A+): The 1985 Bears of THON performances. Rob Bolden was fantastic. Stole the show.
  2. 2016 (A): There is no such thing as too much dabbing.
  3. 2017 (B+): Anthony Johnson and KJ Hamler led a strong, well thought out performance.

Let’s see what the boys had in store this year.

All-in-all not bad, but definitely not the best we’ve seen. Backstreet Boys was a nice touch. Can’t go wrong with 90s boy bands. But I feel like there was a lack of direction, and they were missing that notable piece that makes everything click. No “backpack kid” dance? Heck, how about a dab? I mean, this is elementary.

Fortunately, Yetur Gross-Matos saved the day. Loved the short-short jeans and wig combo. Kid is so versatile — he can get after the quarterback AND he can grind with Micah Parsons. Beautiful.

Grade: B-