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BSD Mailbag 8.10.2018

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The “is a hotdog a sandwich” debate rages on

Dale Zanine-USA TODAY Sports

I don’t want to rejoice in OSU’s disgrace and I won’t, but is it acceptable to look at a list of their committed recruits and targets and do some “shopping”? This isn’t the same as Illinois sending coaches to campus, right? Just want to be sure I’m on the right side of history here. - kijana’s acl

I don’t think it’s the same thing as Illinois sending coaches to campus, because those coaches showed up trying to get players who had already signed their letters of intent to come play for them. This is akin to another coaching staff trying to flip a committed player to them.

For the record, I don’t think many players will end up decommitting over this. Whether Meyer gets fired or not, OSU is still the most talented team in the conference, and has the best chance to make the playoffs in any given year. If Meyer stays, they’ll be fine. If Meyer leaves, they may have one “down” year with an interim coach before hiring someone else and the death machine will keep on rolling.


Can we get a quick pick on next year’s Masters tournament? This is golf, in case you didn’t know. - LarzLion

I haven’t followed golf much lately, but I’m going with my own personal favorite player and saying Tiger Woods.

Now, there’s next to no chance he actually wins it - even playing “improved” golf, he’s still hovering around the cut line. I’m dubious he ever wins another major, but if he won the Masters it would be a big FU to all the haters.


Is a non-commitable offer really an offer? Like, if you’re offering me a free candy bar but won’t give it to me even after i say that i will accept it, you’re not offering me anything - kdm628496

I understand the idea that a non-commitable offer seems like not really an offer, but at the end of the day college football is a business. Some kids grow up knowing 100% where they want to go to school - but if they’re not at the top of a coaching staff’s big board, they may get told that they’re option B. If things go poorly with option A, then they’ll be welcome.

For some kids, this is a tough pill to swallow. They’ve been one of the best athletes on their respective teams for forever, how could they not be good enough? Some of those kids end up going elsewhere, as they feel they’ve been slighted. Others recognize that it’s a business decision, and come to terms with it.

I don’t see it being too big of an issue, as most kids also end up visiting multiple schools, even while having multiple offers. The way I see it is if the kid is going to make the best decision possible for themselves (they absolutely should), the coaching staff should make the best possible decision for the team (they absolutely should).


So, there are these snacks called LÄRABAR Peanut Butter Cookie bars. They are healthy (check) but also taste great (double-check). The problem is they’re so good the local Tar-chez and TJ’s sometimes get low on stock. To ensure good stock quantity when I want to buy them (because it’s all about me) should I start a negative media campaign so demand drops off, or would that be counterproductive in that sales would drop and fewer retailers would carry them, further exacerbating my can’t-find-them-when-I-want-them issue? - Smee

This seems like a fairly foolproof strategy to me. You single-handedly reduce the demand from other buyers, meanwhile the actual amount of product being sold by LÄRABAR remains the same, as you consume all of their bars. I see no way this could go poorly for you, and I recommend you start post haste.


Should I go to the 5b game this year? I went the last time. But not sure I want to spend the money on tickets this time. - JayMPSU

YES

I’ll be there, and I’m super stoked about it. My hope is that a lot of the vitriol from IT has gotten out of the Pitt fans’ system, and it will be a more typical road environment. Regardless, I think it will be an excellent game, and I encourage any and all PSU fans that can make it to do so.


If you find out a recently deceased friend may be guilty of stolen valor, how much would that change your perception of him? - PSU_Lions_84

Yeesh. This is a tough one. If you know more or less for sure that the valor was actually stolen, I have to think that changes your thoughts about him. You could always go the “maybe the information I’m getting is wrong” and leave the subject alone - but I have to think even the inkling that it may be true would be enough to permanently taint your memory of him.


Saquon is gone and Moorhead is gone. So, which team has the best winning percentage this season?

Penn State

Mississippi State

New York Giants

(This question was actually better before the draft, where the third option was “the team that drafts Barkley,” since there was still a chance that might have been the Browns.) - Precious Roy

Oh gosh. Winning percentage is a tough one. For the record I’m extremely bullish on Penn State this year (wait until you see the season prediction post). For that reason alone, I think PSU has the best winning percentage of the three teams.

Looking at MSU’s schedule, they play Kansas State out of conference, and then Florida, Auburn, LSU, TAMU, Bama, Arkansas, and Ole Miss in-conference. As much as I like Moorhead, I think they lose 4 games (maybe 5). So let’s say they finish the year 9-4 (0.692).

And then there are my Giants. I’m thrilled to have Barkley, and I think Pat Shurmur is going to be a good coach for the G-Men. But they were almost comically bad last year. To top my projected MSU finish of 9-4, the Giants would have to win at least 12 games next year - that ain’t happenin’.

So I’ll go PSU-MSU-Giants in terms of winning percentage this year.


Yesterday my 3 year old son told me he was hungry. When I asked him what he wanted, he replied “a hotdog sandwich.”

To my question:

How should I handle this situation.

1. Disown him

B. Go on a witch hunt for the mouth breather who taught him this

iii. Start spending his college fund on stuff I want since he obviously isn’t going to need it. - “that guy”

You’re right - you won’t need to save for college, because that young genius is going to get a full academic scholarship wherever he goes to school. We’re talking about the next Stephen Hawking here, people. A true prodigy who will completely rewrite the history books by the time he’s done.


Who is your favorite host on America’s Got Talent? Is Mel B really as warm a person as she seems? I think I’m falling in love with her. - 48-14

I legitimately have no idea who is on AGT. I think there’s still that guy from American Idol who I remember being very mean, and Howie perhaps? He’s always seemed very goofy to me. Mel B was a Spice Girl (albeit Scary Spice), so she’ll get the nod as the best of the bunch. 90s for the win!