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Name That Baby: Which Penn State Athletes’ Name Would You Like To Borrow?

Does anyone out there need a name for their baby? Let’s put together some offerings.

Jeff Hartings Penn State

Thirty years ago Shaquille O’Neal burst on the national stage at LSU, becoming a household name by the time he was twenty years old. A decade or so later, the name Shaquille began popping up around the country as a result of people naming their son after O’Neal.

Shaquille O’Neal’s former teammate and fellow generational talent, Kobe Bryant, has had a similar influence. It is likely that Kobe Brown, a Penn State basketball target who chose to attend Missouri on Tuesday, was named after the former Laker star.

It made me wonder, within the Penn State community, will we see an uptick in children named Trace in the years to come? Will there be a batch of Saquon’s coming through the high school football ranks in the coming decades?

Lourawls Nairn Jr. was named after singer Lou Rawls, and the former Michigan State basketball player was also blessed with a fabulous nickname, Tum Tum. We should all be so lucky.

It surprises me that there aren’t more Lavars running around in Penn State circles. Former Penn State basketball player Cilk McSweeney never did much on the court but his name could go a long way, and it wouldn’t have the obvious name recognition.

Something tells me that there is going to be an increase in children named Micah in the coming years. Parsons will likely be a memorable player by the time he leaves Happy Valley. There is already a group of fans ready to pull the trigger on that name. Should the child turn out to require a female name, the last two letters could be swapped, and the little girl could proudly be known as Micha, in honor of former Penn State volleyball player Micha Hancock.

There have been many players over the past few decades since I have been watching Penn State sports that have stood out. Crispin Taylor kind of has a ring to it, but it’s probably too close to my own name for comfort. Talor Taylor would doom the poor kid to a lifetime of spelling his name for everyone. I’ll leave that Battle to someone else.

Any boy born with a dimple in his chin would have to be named BO’b. Sure, his full name would be RO’bert Mauti Taylor, but we’d use the shorter version most of the time. If there was a different name selected prior to the discovery of the chin dimple, an audible would be called immediately, checking out of the original name.

I have always been a big C. Montgomery Burns fan. I like the first name initial whenever possible. I would slap the name J. Hartings Taylor on the next kid that the stork brings along. Not every child can grow up to be an interior offensive lineman with a nasty disposition, but we can dream, right? Excellent.

There have been a few babies born into the Black Shoe Diaries family in recent years, and although none were given Penn State-inspired names, there is still a chance to get it right.

Marty Leap missed the chance to name his son Lavar. That’s one that we’ll never get back. Trace Lucia seems like it would be a great fit. Yetur Moreta-Feliz? Why not YM-F? Coquese Collyer has a nice ring to it.

Of all the former Penn State players that you can think of, which would you be most inclined to name your child, or if given the chance, someone else’s newborn baby? You never know when someone is going to ask you to name their baby, right?