Only Theo Johnson Until Penn State Football

You ever look at a guy and think “he needs a nickname?”

No? Just me?

Well, in any case, I’m nicknaming Theo Johnson the Canadian Goose, or simply Goose if you prefer.

Why?

Well, for starters, Theo is Canadian. I know! Breaking news.

When I think of Canada, I think of hockey, maple syrup, and geese.

The first two don’t translate well to the football field, but a goose would.

Why? When you think of a Canadian goose, what do you think?

I think tenacious. Aggressive. Fast.

All things you want in a football player, yes?

Also, Mr. Johnson plays tight end, the latest in a successful string of players at the position for the Lions. The most recent success story?

Pat “Moose” Freiermuth.

Know what rhymes with moose?

Goose!

I rest my case.

Only 84 days until Penn State football!